Communication can be confusing and often times can lead to misunderstandings, especially if you only communicate via email. Words do not have intonation, like in the spoken tongue. Even if you are specific there is room for interpretation. That is why if you can speak on the phone or in person that gives you the entire picture, as you get a feeling for what the caller is conveying to you. Just the other day one of my clients emailed me; naturally I responded however it would have been better if we spoke about her situation as emailing was just one dimensional in my opinion. I attempted to cover as much as I could yet; if we could clarify on the phone then the response would have been more tailored to her needs. You find examples of vague communication all over the place, this is so you fill in the blanks with your own interpretation and this way the blanket message covers a wider audience. Billboards, slogans and even on television you will find some kind of ambiguity in the...

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Tomorrow we are attending a funeral, someone I knew for a long time, he succummed to cancer and naturally his passing makes me stop and think about what life means to people. As a coach I sincerely believe that we get one chance to live authentically, this life. Whatever you believe in faith-wise I get that however for me it is THIS life that matters. You live according to what is the important to you, share time with people you really care about and indulge in the pleasures that make you feel wonderful and special. The gentleman who passed away had a simple yet rewarding life he enjoyed spending time with his grandchildren, his partner and he loved the horse races. I will remember him always having a radio ear piece stuck in his ear attentively listening to the current race. This was his absolute passion. Glad he got to enjoy it so much. That is why it is never too late to really go for it, if you have a fear of something and wonder what it would be like, then you are preventing...

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Well we are at the end of our second week here in Chile and it seems that we have been here for a longer time. We have done so much already, covered many kms sightseeing, taking over 200 photos and have eaten our way through many restaurants, cafes and naturally enjoyed home-cooked meals. Yes holidays are made of this. When you relax mentally your body also relaxes and some people get sick as their immune system also relaxes. Well that was the first 10 days for the 3 of us; it was bound to happen with the temperature change plus the time zone difference. Holidays have that impact on you I guess, now I am in a better place and can take in the atmosphere of this sleepy little village. We are about 2 hours drive from the capital on the coast. Nice place to unwind and watch the seagulls up above. Remember that even though it is a holiday, anything can happen and being flexible is the key that is my lesson I take from this trip and share with you. When you are easy-going things w...

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Once again I am reminded how fortunate I am, all I see around me is love, connection, sincerity, authenticity, integrity and humility. Yet lately as I have been stuck by the winter cold, I am down and thus my body is showing me pain. If I only look at the bigger picture I have so much to be grateful for and this article is a dedication to those in my life who make me smile and make me the person I am today. So firstly those people who put up with me every day, thanks for your patience and your strength. You make me want to be a better person every day so I can be the best role model for you. Alexa you are my reason. Thomas you are my love. To my dearest sister, we may not touch base every week, yet you are in my warmest thoughts and I wish you all the best in every little adventure you take. I love you. My parents who I speak to practically every day, I may not hug you each day, but with the internet we are closer and I cannot wait to hug you for real in a few days time. You are the...

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Encouragement is something important that we all need to help us achieve our goals in life. Encouragement gives us the impetus to keep moving towards our goals.   There are times in our life where we doubt our ability to achieve certain things. I know that when I decided to transition from a career in the military to setting up a coaching business those doubts existed. What helped me though was the encouragement that I received from my coach and from my wife. They believed that I could be successful and encouraged me to take the necessary steps.   I suggest that you look to surround yourself with people who are encouragers. Encouragers are people who instill the belief in you that you can achieve whatever you want. They are optimistic people. Having people like this in your environment will be tremendously helpful for you. Consider these people to be your cheerleading team. They want you to succeed and to be happy in life.   The way to attract encouragers into you...

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A fellow colleague told me the story about a training organization that is not functioning very well. They are not paying their employees on time and have very little internal communication. Needless to say they are not working as effectively and the morale is at an all time low. This obviously affects their service delivery as staff do not feel valued and also impacts direct business. Their enrollments for courses and workshops are struggling to fill up. The energy is negative and thus so is the results that they are getting. From an outsider’s perspective I ask " if you do not have integrity and value towards your employees how can you attract new business and retain good working relationships with your clients?". As I often say, if you work on the internal and get this right then the external will match this, as you become congruent with your environment and you begin to attract opportunities and meet the right people that will help you on your journey. As a coach, ...

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Let go so that you can be free like a butterfly. When you let go it allows you the freedom to live the life that you want. You need to let go of things that are keeping you stuck and not allowing you to move forward towards what you desire in your life. So, what are some of the things that you may need to let go of in order for you to be free to live the life that you want. The Past: Don’t allow past experiences to rule the rest of your life. Learn from them and apply the learning to create a better life for you. Living in the past will take energy and focus away from the action you need to take in the present to achieve the results that you want in your future. Fear: Fear stops us from taking action that can improve our life. Rather than focus on the fear of taking action focus on the benefits that taking action will bring into your life. Be driven by the benefits. The Need to Please Everyone: Don’t live your life for everyone else. It is important that you respect and satisfy y...

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I just reconnected with an old work colleague and it was so nice to hear from him. Last time we spoke he had a young family and seemed to be doing well. It is interesting that from appearances we think people are doing well from the outside however he was going through some relationship issues with his wife. As he is recently remarried and expecting another little one. I guess he has now found his relationship happiness and I am so happy for him. Life is too short to be with the wrong person, we just don’t allow ourselves to shine and grow as we are too busy ‘trying’ to fix the insecurities of the other person. We change to suit them and in the long term this does not serve us anymore. We do not like ourselves anymore and we lose our sense of self. Ultimately we begin to gather confidence to tackle our own insecurities and find our own happiness, after all our spouses are not responsible for our happiness we are! So taking responsibility and accountability is the first step. When we...

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Keeping a relationship sweet with a spouse or partner over the years can often be pretty challenging. The same can also be said of business relationships. Put the two together and WOW! The concept of 'relationship skills' will take on a whole different meaning! Having lived and worked together with my husband for over 20 years, both in a  home office and away from home premises. Needless to say there have been “moments”, while we’ve learned a lot about how to run a micro business together, we've also found ways to keep our personal relationship interesting and romantic. Here are some of the strategies we have developed: • Keep the space between you clean with regular WIFLS (What I feel like saying).  Often before we go to bed at night, or even during the day if one of us can feel some tension, we ask, “Have you any WIFLS”.  This can quickly handle any misunderstandings over something the other has said or done that we disagree with or are upset about.  It ...

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What appointments are you making in your life? Is your diary full of appointments related to work? For most people I would say that this is the case. Have you thought of making appointments for other areas of your life? I believe that it is important for us to make appointments for all areas of our life. This allows us to achieve a balanced approach to life. Don’t just fill up your diary with appointments related to work. What I am suggesting is that you be deliberate in making appointments for all areas of your life. Make a specific date and time that you are going to do things. By doing so you will ensure that you are not neglecting important areas of your life. Don’t allow the important areas to be low on the priorities list and something that you will only do if you have the time. You will most likely never have the time to do many of these things if you don’t commit a date and time to doing them. You need to make time for these areas and you can do this by planning them into y...

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