Don’t think of a red apple, no I said don’t think of a red apple!
He he...
What did you just think of? Give me a clap if you just thought of a red apple. Yipeeeee, thank you!
No, I’m not a mind reader, however what I do know is this....... you can’t think about, what you don’t want to think about, without thinking about it. Think about that!
Yep, I’ll say it again and I bet you’re saying it in your head slowly, right now..........you can’t think about, what you don’t want to think about, without thinking about it. Think about that! So........What’s this all about then?
Why is it some people might say “I hope I don’t put on weight like I did last time I went on a diet? What are they really focused on telling themselves? Of course,.....putting on weight. What are they just as likely to do in the long run? Put on weight, right? Because that’s the image they have created in their mind.
Think about it for a second, what happens when a person who wants to create a great relationship is thinking,” I hope he doesn’t leave me” What are they really focused on, gaining a great relationship or doing everything they can for the person not to leave them, which will probably cause the person to leave them anyway as there is so much pressure involved in them staying!
OUR FOCUS and LANGUAGE DETERMINES OUR RESULTS - seriously it does!
Why is it that sometimes a performer will go out to perform and think “ahhh, I hope I don’t get nervous” Where is there focus, really? Doing well or is it on not messing up or getting nervous?
So you’ve got to become like a laser with your focus and language. Focus on what you want to the exclusion of everything else, that way you gain power and focus.
When you become a master of focus you become a master of life. Come on......think about it.
When you look at excellent performers in every context of life, isn’t this true? For example, footballers like James Hird (Essendon) Do you think he tells himself every time he runs on the ground “I hope I don’t have bad game” of course not, he is probably saying “I’m going to play my best, I’m gonna be courageous and run hard at the ball “ What about Kylie Minogue? Do you think she would be saying “I hope I don’t sing out of tune or mess up that dance move”, of course not, she is focused on what she wants, I’m guessing it’s at giving her absolute best, all of the time and entertaining her audience.
These people and many more experts in their field are masters of focus. Warren Buffet in the financial world and Richard Branson, again, are masters of focus.
It’s true, is it not, that thoughts become words, words become actions, actions become habits, habits become a way of life and give us our results, good or bad. Wow, what a huge impact our thoughts hold in our lives!
Just think about it for a second, we have thousands of conversations per day, not only with others but with ourselves (in our heads) True, huh! If we paid attention to the words we used, of course we can turn a negative feeling around, too easy!
Give it a go, after all you have nothing to lose .Next time you’re talking to a person about what you want in your life, listen to the language you’re using. Is it moving towards what you want or away?
Words like “ I should”, “ I want”, “ I need”, “have to” and “I don’t know” are words used frequently by a lot of us in our everyday conversations. It’s such a shame that all these words are pretty useless as they give us no power. They tend to suggest that we have given up control and accountability for our actions to someone or something else.
Ok, give these babies a go! They are gold! “I am”, “I choose”, “I can”, “I’ll find out”, “I claim” and “I’ll create”. Very cool, hey! Take a second to read them aloud.....How do they make you feel? In control and accountable, wouldn’t you agree? They can’t not!
Now I have brought this to your awareness, there is one little tool I will share with you to make this flow even more. Be specific on what you want.
Most people who want to change a behaviour or actually anything in life, tend to fail because they tend not to be too vague about the outcomes they want. I have heard so many people say “one day I will give up smoking or I’m going to try and lose weight” This is very general and lacks total commitment, avoiding the feelings around the undesired behaviour. It gives you a let off scenario if it doesn’t work out. Once again, focusing on “if it doesn’t work out”!!!!!Come on, were you totally 100% committed in your heart to making change?
How many times have you bumped into a person you have not seen for a while and said: “Oh, we must get together soon and catch up, it’s been too long.” And they say “definitely, we must. Let’s meet up soon.” And then you go on your way, not to see each other for another few months, when again, I bet you say......
One useful way to help change your language and focus is to get to the point, be specific .What do you want to do and when.
If you want to change your results, change your language and focus. You really do move in the direction of what you consistently think about.
This sounds so ridiculously simple and yes you’re right!