Learning When To Say NO

I was adding to our Click A Life Coach - Forum and updating my goals for 2008 when I found myself being hit hard by my own revelation. This year is already flying by and I have found on more than one occasion that I am getting slightly overwhelmed by everything that I have to do.

Taking the viewpoint that we are responsible for our own situation, I realised that I have created this mayhem. Taking some much needed time out over the Easter long weekend has made me recognise that I’ve bitten off more than I can chew (sorry for the cheesy cliche).

I used to think that if someone needed my help then I had better give it to them (after all, it makes me feel good about myself too). And there’s nothing wrong with this belief system at all (if only there were more helpful people in the world!) The danger comes though from being too helpful.

Yes it sounds crazy – but this can occur in two ways:

• Saying ‘yes’ to everything that is asked of you
• Seeking out actions and volunteering to assist

   

  How many times have you accepted someone’s request for help, or offered off your own bat, only to find that you’re left feeling guilty because you haven’t done what you’ve said you’d do?

  Well if this sounds like you (and me!) then its time to take a step back and reconsider your priorities - you can’t do everything for everyone. Work out what is important to you right now and what can be left alone for awhile, then communicate this to the other people involved. If someone can’t respect you for your honesty then chances are they weren’t going to respect you for your help anyway.